Blessings outside the wedding: the pastoral courage of the German Catholic Church

Text by Ludwig Ring-Eifel, published in the Catholic portal Katholisch.de (Germany) on July 18, 2025. Freely translated by the volunteers of the Gionata project.

The moat between the Vatican and the German Catholic Church seems to shrink. In Germany, two dioceses have recently made steps forward in the blessings for couples who cannot or do not want to get married, while in Rome they are observed carefully. But the tensions have not gone.

Bless those who cannot (or do not want) get married

What are the germans combining? This is the question that, paraphrasing Trapattoni, ask themselves - even if only behind the scenes - vatican managers. these Are the blessings for couples who, according to catholic teaching, cannot access the sacrament of marriage: pairs of the same sex, remarried people remarried, but also those who live without civil or religious bond.

For now, the Vatican is limited to observing: since these blessings are not considered sacramental or liturgical acts, they do not require authorization from Rome.

Yet, in no other Catholic country, initiatives to offer ecclesial recognition to these couples have gone on as much as in Germany. Among the first to move there were the dioceses of Limburg and Rottenburg-Straccarda.

Limburg: "The sign of God in every love that relies on"

On July 10, the diocese of Limburg - led by Bishop Georg Bätzing, president of the German Episcopal Conference - published his own recommendation for the implementation of the pastoral guide Segen gibt der Liebe Kraft. Revorational für Paare, die sich lieben ("The gift of the blessing strengthens love. Blessings for couples who love each other"), drawn up by the German Episcopal Conference and the Central Committee of German Catholics (Zdk) and made public on April 23, during the Roman vacant office after the death of Pope Francis.

The recommendation reads: "The Guide provides for blessing celebrations for couples who cannot or do not want to contract sacramental marriage - including divorced and remarried couples, pairs of the same sex, interconfecessive couples. Their request for blessing is an expression of gratitude for the love received and hope in a future accompanied by God".

The document also specifies its alignment with the Vatican Declaration Confidence supplicans, published on 18 December 2024 under the aegis of Cardinal Víctor Manuel Fernández with the approval of Pope Francis: "This blessing does not base a relationship, and should not be confused with the sacramental ritual of marriage. It is instead the request, by the already united partners, of the blessing of God on their shared life".

Rottenburg-Straccarda: concrete materials and new pastoral roads

On the same day, the diocese of Rottenburg-Straccarda also presented the liturgical collection Wir lieben uns - welch ein Segen! ("We love each other - What a blessing!"), With proposals of prayers and blessing formulas designed for couples who wish to want spiritual recognition, regardless of their civil status or sexual orientation.

The publication, not signed by the current bishop, states: "With this collection of materials, the diocese opens up new ways of pastoral accompaniment for couples who ask for the spiritual support of the Church in their common path".

The text is specifically aimed at the people in charge of the pastoral care who wish to accompany unmarried, remarry, or belonging to the variety of sexual guidelines and gender identities, offering them support in the significant moments of their life.

Anche questa iniziativa si rifà esplicitamente a Fiducia supplicans, interpretata così: “Dove le persone si incontrano con amore e responsabilità, Dio è presente – e questa comunione è degna di benedizione. Le preghiere proposte prendono sul serio la varietà delle relazioni odierne e manifestano che la Chiesa non solo riconosce questo amore, ma desidera accompagnarlo”.

Ma Roma avverte: niente riti, niente ambiguità

Tuttavia, un confronto diretto con il testo di Fiducia supplicans mostra che le interpretazioni tedesche, specie quella di Rottenburg-Stoccarda, non sono sempre pienamente coerenti con le intenzioni espresse da Roma. Il documento vaticano afferma chiaramente: “Non si deve promuovere la benedizione di coppie in situazioni irregolari né prevedere rituali a tal fine. Tuttavia, non si deve nemmeno proibire che la Chiesa si faccia vicina a chi chiede l’aiuto di Dio attraverso una semplice benedizione”.

La dichiarazione vaticana specifica inoltre che tali benedizioni non devono essere in alcun modo associate a celebrazioni civili, né assumere gesti, abiti o parole che evochino un matrimonio. Ciò vale anche per le coppie dello stesso sesso.

Resta dunque aperta la questione se le preghiere raccolte dalla diocesi di Stoccarda rispondano a tali criteri: sarà compito di esperti liturgisti valutarlo.

Prima di Fiducia supplicans, in Germania si era andati oltre

The new German initiatives are however more moderate than those advanced in 2023 by the Arbeitsgemeinschaft für Katholische Familieldibledung (Akf), an association based in Bonn in which a delegate of the Episcopal Conference also sits.

On that occasion, the Akf had published a pastoral guide for the blessing of couples, still based on Amoris Laetitia (2016), in which the proposed rites resembled so much to a wedding celebration that the border with marriage was not very distinguishable for non -insiders.

These materials, drawn up before the publication of trusted plea, exploited the margin open by Amoris Laetitia, which left large spaces of interpretation on the pastoral care of couples in irregular situations.

Today the German dioceses return to watch (at least formally) in Rome

The new season opened by trusted supplicans, while granting possibilities, has also delimited the boundaries more clearly. And this has had a concrete effect: the initiatives of the German dioceses are being oriented again - at least in terms of language and form - towards the Roman indications, with a prudence that differs from the most daring tones taken during the path of the German synodal path.

Original text: Ringen um kirchlichen Segen für nicht-Eheliche Paare geht weiter