Be a lesbian nun in a community of female consecrated life

Text taken from the booklet Out of Silence God Has Called Me; A Lesbian Religious Tells Her Story (From silence God called me. A lesbian nun tells its story), by Sister Janet Rozzano RSM, published in 2008 by the LGBT Cattolica New Ways Ministry association, pp. 10-13, freely translated by Diana, revision of Giovanna and Giacomo Tessaro, part fourth

The female religious communities. Firstly, I would like to say that the lesbian nuns perhaps represent the quieter and hidden subgroup of the gay and lesbian Catholic community. In many religious this creates the illusion that there are no lesbian religious religious, or there are very few, and therefore it is not an important theme.

These nuns are not only hidden, but they are resources that could help themselves and other members of our communities. Many leaders, despite their desire to support lesbian nuns, have no idea what resources are available to meet them. Often only by chance, or through anguished and isolated research, the lesbian nuns manage to find people, groups or written material that can answer their questions and help them integrate their sexual orientation.

Secondly, we rarely speak of sexuality between the religious, and this significantly contributes to ambiguity and lack of freedom. For this reason we often give the impression of being asexual, of not having feelings, concerns or difficulties related to sex, or we give the impression of being all heterosexuals. Although some individual nuns think that this is not true, groups and their leaders, often unconsciously, speak, write and act from a heterosexist point of view.

In an atmosphere like this, even conversations on more generic themes, such as friendship or intimacy, are not easy to deal with, and the nuns do not feel comfortable when the threatening theme of sexual orientation emerges.

Third, the silence in our communities allows harmful stereotypes and wrong ideas to be contested or correct, and can thus circulate; Ironically, this occurs in one of the most educated female groups of our society. As a result, in most of our communities there are at least some nuns who believe truths of falsehoods such as the following:

• lesbians are always sexually active;

• A lesbian nun always thinks about sex, and it is very likely to make proposals to other sisters. Consequently, lesbians are not suitable for religious life;

• Being lesbians is a shame. We do not want them, nor do we feel the need to have them, in our community;

• The women's friendly women are probably too;

• If the lesbian nuns reveal themselves, people will think that all of us are lesbians.

Fourth, always on the theme of the lesbians who are among us, i think that the heterosexual members of our communities are in a position similar to that of a dominant culture that tries to deal with a minority that lives in the midst of it: often we do not notice the way in which its culture operates, until it enters into contrast with the needs and desires of minority culture.

An example that is often mentioned is the difficulty of the heterosexual nuns to understand why the lesbian sisters want to make their sexual orientation public. They ask: "Why do they have to talk about their sexual orientation? The themes related to sexuality, such as sexual orientation, are not questions that concern our private life, something to speak only with intimate friends, with the spiritual father or the counselor? We religious, however, are still kept in the bachelorette party".

Finally, the thought of how a greater opening can be perceived between the lesbian nuns by the official church further obscures this problem, and pushes even more the lesbian nuns and their communities in a kingdom full of silence and fear.

The spectrum of the "What if ...?", which makes it hesitate and back away otherwise courageous women. What if our lesbian consumer talked about his sexual orientation with the colleagues of the parish school where He teaches? what if it joined a gay and lesbian group that has differences with the ecclesiastical authorities? What if it expresses doubts or dissent towards the doctrine Of the church on These issues? and if the long -standing supporters of the community, or some of our members, criticized our lesbian sisters for their involvement in gay and lesbian ministries, or simply to be open on these Issues? what if our community was accused by the ecclesiastical authorities due to the activities of a lesbian sisted consumer?

The events of recent years make these "What if ...?" more than simple concerns, and present very real challenges, especially for the superiors of religious communities. I believe that this unhappy situation, made of fearful and harmful silence, contributes to a thin, often unconscious, oppression of the lesbian nuns in our communities.

I am convinced that most of the religious wants to sincerely welcome and support lesbian sisters, but often they don't know how to do it concretely. As a result, lesbian nuns are expected to be well integrated in this very important aspect of their life, but without them being offered to do resources to do it. We want them to feel free to be what they are, but we hope they don't speak too much about what they are. We believe that each person has been created in the image of God, and called to share his goodness with others, but we are faced with a description of our lesbian sisters such as "Objectively disordered", and we struggle to understand these words in a positive way.

I am reminded of a phrase from the beautiful South African environment novel by Alan Paton, Cry, the beloved country (Cry, loved country): "It is the fear that the country governs". The genuine energies of love are suffocated in such a climate of fear.

Original text (PDF): Out of silence god has called me. A lesbian religious tells her story

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