Kicked out of home at 16 for being gay: "I'm fighting to make things change"

Article published on the Lambda-education website (Switzerland), freely translated by Marco Galvagno

1991, Jacob Elier is twelve years old. One Sunday morning he is sitting next to his best friend on the pews of the church in Anderson, a small town of 3000 inhabitants in Indiana, in the heart of the United States. While he is listening to the sermon of the pastor who once again preached the flames of hell for homosexuals, he turns to his friend. Their gazes remain locked. “At the end of the service we confessed our love to each other” says Jacob.
Since his mother, a longtime drug addict, remarried an alcoholic, fundamentalist Christian evangelist, Jake, as they call him, has been forced to go there every Sunday. He had no doubt that he would meet his first love there. Since he was little Jake has known perfectly well that he feels emotions towards boys and what it means.
“I have four gay cousins ​​and they were all rejected by their family (because they were gay).” He quickly realized that it was better to stay quiet in that hostile environment. For four years she lived in a clandestine relationship with her boyfriend. Until one day a friend of his who was jealous of him picked up the phone and told his mother everything.

Suicide attempt

“He beat me violently and kicked me out of the house, then he tried to commit suicide” declares the boy with the sharp look. So when Jake went to visit her in the hospital, she accused him of being the cause of her own unhappiness. Desperate, he goes to live with his father and goes to a psychotherapist to try to reconcile with himself. During that time the mother tells the father that she is gay. “He also immediately kicked me out and disinherited me. My entire family never spoke to me again. I didn't know where to go. I found myself on the street.”
At 16, Jake goes to live with a lesbian friend. “I continued to go to school and worked 40 hours a week as a nurse's aide to support myself. At the same time he gets involved in a group of young gay people in Indianapolis. He openly declares his homosexuality at school and this creates a lot of problems for him.
“Those who I thought were my friends spat on me and humiliated me. They tried to smash my face several times and no teacher ever intervened. Nobody protected me. The principal even said it was my fault, that I went looking for it.” This didn't stop me from staying in school and doing well in my studies. I had friends who supported me.

Flat tires and broken windows

The following spring Jake meets a boy. “We had been dating for a few months. I decided to take him to prom. I didn't want to lie or go to prom with a girl. I confided it to a friend who went and told the whole school. On the morning of the dance, leaving the house to go to school I found all four wheels of my car punctured and the windows had been broken and fagot (faggot) engraved on the door. I went to the police to report it and they notified the journalists.
The news was in every Indiana newspaper, on the internet and in national newspapers. This caused anger and embarrassment to the school management. But I didn't care and went to the dance, hand in hand with my boyfriend. The police and journalists were present at the scene. We danced and kissed. I was also elected king of the evening, since my friends had voted for me.”
The next day Jake was mobbed by the media. “I was interviewed and invited to talk shows, a producer even proposed making a film about my life”. The contract has been signed and Jake collaborates on the script. Meanwhile he is also one of the most active members of the Indianapolis group PFLAG and travels the country in defense of the rights of young gay people. “
I go to speak in schools and also give conferences. I tell my story in order to make people aware that homophobia is bad. I'm fighting for things to change."

Now Jake no longer speaks to his family. “Everyone rejects me. They refuse to talk to me. They are just afraid and ignorant. I hope that one day things will change. I am ready to forgive them. I want to be stronger than them, I just want them to be happy."

Original text: He left the house at 16 years old