To fail to see the pain caused by theology used against LGBT people is to ignore the message of Christ
Alicia's testimony Johnston, an Adventist lesbian, posted on the site Believe Out Loud (United States), freely translated by the volunteers of the Gionata Project
Last night I attended my father's funeral. For years I put off coming out because of his illness. I knew he already faced his fragility and impending death, and adding the complexity of my LGBT identity could crush him. He was the kind of man who, seeing a same-sex couple on TV, would change the channel in disgust, determined never to watch that program again.
I don't regret never telling him who i am, nor do i think i ever will.
If I had confessed to being queer, for him it would have been like denying God. But for me, it means following God's will, welcoming the love and truth that reside in the heart that God has given me. My father wouldn't have understood it.
After his death, watching him in his last sleep, I realized that he would never know the real me. I cried desperately for everything I wanted to share with him but couldn't.
The memorial service was a time of great love and support. Friends and members of my church, where I am pastor, remembered my father with heartfelt words, hugging me and assuring me that he was proud of me.
But I know that everything will change soon. In a few weeks, when I openly reveal my bisexual identity, the esteem these same people have for me will crumble.
At the moment, I represent for them a confirmation of what the church teaches, a model of an Adventist pastor. But, soon, they will no longer see my vocation as a sign of divine grace. I will become a threat because I also love women.
I already know that I will no longer be able to be a pastor in this or other Adventist communities.
The theology of my church, with its position against queer people, breaks something beautiful: the Christian community, which can be a refuge of love and welcome, instead becomes a place of silence and shame for those who, like me, are queer.
In mainstream churches, lGBT people Face impossible choices: hide or demonize who they are. this Price is unsustainable, especially when the love we feel is not a sin, but a gift.
Loving and living fully as God created us is too much for a community that would rather exclude than include. However, the Gospel was never intended for a select few, but for everyone. and To ignore the pain caused by anti-LGBT theology is to ignore the very heart of christ's Message.
Original text: ADVENTIST. Theology Ruined My Father's Memorial Service
