Maria, walking companion (Luke 1,26-38 Matteo 1,18-25)

Return* by Mariella Colosimo of the enclosure of biblical reflection of WORD… AND WORDS group** of 10 December 2024

We have listened to this song many times, it is a bit like being faced with a picture, in fact there are countless paintings that portray this scene ... The Annunciation, various styles, various colors, different intensity, but the message is always the same: the girl of Nazareth is the incarnation of docility and submissiveness to the supreme divine will.

To me, Christian with the tendency to be a little rebellious, accustomed to wanting to think with his own head beyond dogmas, other reflections come to mind ...

The first is the absolutely unconventional way in which the Son of God comes to the world: Mary is a young girl promised in marriage (therefore not yet married) who, on the point in white, finds face to face with the transcendent. Mary in front of this shows a disturbance, in fact the angel's response is "Do not fear"... So Maria is afraid, she is small, she doesn't know what's going on.

Luca's song, jumping every possible hesitation, fear, doubt from the future Mother of God, goes to the conclusion, that is, to his yes, always interpreted as a sign of custody and obedience.

I believe that the Annunciation, rather than a mystical experience, was an earthquake in the life of this girl. Having a son without being married wanted to say certain stone. The announcement of the angel overturns his life forever. His yes is a choice of courage and not of blind obedience.

In a book by Susanna Tamaro entitled "Every angel is terrible" the writer referring to angels who bring news means not as seraphics cherubini but as warriors carriers of upsetting ads.

The family of Jesus begins in this way, in an absolutely alternative way and Mary has saved her life only thanks to the goodness of Joseph who, generously, showing a very rare inclusive personality in those days decides, for the great love he has for her, to repudiate her in secret. And here again the angel this time by Giuseppe in a dream, he also accepts.

Two courageous, unconventional, alternative choices: a woman and a fearful man of God and obedient? Definitely yes. But also a couple who has the courage to "blow up the table" reversing all the conventions of the company in which they lived.

Michela Murgia writes in "Ave Mary": "There is nothing conventional in all this, but only determination to be the protagonists of her life, a girl and a mature man who, with courage, start on the way to travel a road not clear at all.

Thus was born God, in the effort of saying yes without being afraid of shame and what people say. "

Our "terrible angel" arrived on an afternoon in June 2012 when my 23 -year -old son made his coming out. At a time all our certainties have jumped and the disturbance was great.

The "scheme" of our family has suddenly gone to pieces and we too went to pieces, in the body, in the soul and in the psyche ... an absolute earthquake.

Today, after more than 12 years from that day we can say that that announcement that seemed terrible changed our lives, making us better people, made us overcome prejudices, conventions, mental obtuses, closures to what had not taken into account and made us also overcome the catechism, or at least some of its parts, and the blind obedience to the Church.

When about 8 years later, our eldest son also made his coming out was all easy: they were only hugs, smiles and our comment full of joy was: "Finally that you said it!".

Now we feel chosen people to bring to the world a different word, to testify this reality as it is. We got on the way and, thanks to this group, we met other people who live situations similar to ours. We feel good and we could not imagine our children other than what they are.

Now, like Maria, we can say "here I am, you do me according to your will!".

I who my name is Giuseppe are doubly asked to share tonight on the songs of the Gospel we have chosen.

Like my patron and also as a father, in particular after the coming out of the first child, I found myself involved in a situation that I did not expect. It was not easy to overcome all the conditions I had created. The project of my future was upset and the Lord wanted to raise the bar to get me up higher.

However, it was enough to love my son as it was and even more than before.

At the coming out of the second child then everything was simpler and I immediately managed to welcome him.

Precisely on the reception I found a part of the apostolic letter of Pope Francis (Patris Corde) written on the occasion of the 150th anniversary of the St. Joseph's declaration as the patron of the Universal Church. I report a short part of chapter 4 that will help us in tonight's reflection.

"4. Father in reception: Giuseppe welcomes Maria without putting preventive conditions. He trusted the words of the angel. «The nobility of his heart makes him subordinate to charity what he learned by law; And today, in this world in which psychological, verbal and physical violence on the woman is evident, Giuseppe presents himself as a respectful man figure, delicate that, although not possessing all the information, it is decided for the reputation, dignity and life of Mary. And in his doubt about how to act in the best way, God helped him to choose by illuminating his judgment ".

Many times, in our life, events happen that we do not understand the meaning. Our first reaction is often of disappointment and rebellion. Giuseppe leaves aside his reasoning to make room for what happens and, however much he may appear to his mysterious eyes, he welcomes him, he takes on responsibility and reconciles with his own story. If we do not reconcile with our history, we will not even be able to take a subsequent step, because we will always remain hostage of our expectations and the consequent disappointments.

The spiritual life that Joseph shows us is not a way that explains, but a way that welcomes. Only starting from this welcome, from this reconciliation, can a greater history, a deeper meaning can also be guessed".

After years I believe that the reaction I had at the time of the coming out would no longer have it. He saved us the love we have for our children.

The impressions we had in front of the coming out of our children, sometimes expected sometimes unexpected, but resemble each other a little: earthquake at the beginning, but then the love for our children won, encouraged by this and from our faith slowly we have overcome and now we see things with different eyes.

We are discovering today the girl of Nazareth who finds herself living a story bigger than her, we made Mary descend from the altars. This Mary I feel close, the Virgin Mary and Mother, proposed as a model and example to women, is inimitable: no woman can identify herself in her.

But did he really know everything from the beginning Mary because the angel had revealed it to him? So why, as the Gospel of Marco tells, had gone, together with the brothers and sisters of Jesus, to take him back, believing him crazy?

The gospels of childhood that tell the Annunciation and the birth of Jesus are not historical, they do not tell the chronicle of the facts, yet they say something true. Luca and Matteo did not know how Jesus was born, however they knew his life and knew how he had died. Thus they imagine a birth that resembles his life. They are then marginalized people, like the shepherds, to welcome him, and a powerful to persecute him to kill him

It here Di Maria, who appears so convinced in response to the angel's announcement, will not have been so easy as to pronounce for her in her life.

Jesus was also a misunderstood in his family, who took him for mad and perhaps feared that his bad frequentations could muddy the good name of the entire family. Therefore they opposed, more or less consciously, to its mission. The mother also hindered him. Not even she understood, not immediately.

Perhaps Mary glimpses the shadow of the cross on the road of Jesus. How could he let him go? How could he not try to stop him?

That of his Here I am He took time to come out, he had to deal with that terrible death touched on his son: he is with him Mary at the foot of the cross - John's Gospel tells us - to share the pain, humiliation, the scandal of the cross with Jesus. It is no longer time for good advice and invitations to prudence ... every resistance falls and, after the death of Jesus, Mary will become his disciple. Then his Here I am It will be full.

Maria, sister and walking companion, in the difficulties that we encounter our children and daughters every day, to accept them as they are, without traping them in our expectations about them, to let them go to the road they choose to travel. A story, his, so close to that of many mothers who live the refusal of their sons and daughters by society and the Church. To the history of the mothers of LGBT people who, after coming out, struggle to understand, are crushed by the shame and fear for the life of their children. It will also happen to Maria, as they, to ask themselves: where did I make a mistake?

But on that impervious journey, as to Mary, to feel touched by the breath of the Holy Spirit, who takes the freedom to ask for permission from any institution e "As the wind blows where he wants and you don't know where he comes from or where he goes", looking for discarded stones, to give birth to life and hope again. A journey in which to rediscover a freeding faith and meet, together with Mary, the God of Magnificat, who "Noned the powerful from their thrones and the humble raises".

The angel announces to Mary greatness, but the history of Jesus is different, it seems to go in another direction. Yet everything is already in the announcement. It is we who do not recognize and do not want to understand God's plan on our children, but there is that project.

This young man I think he did not understand immediately, but there is a Mary, that of the wedding at Cana, who had understood what Jesus could do, while the others had not understood it.

Our children will realize not ours, but God's project on them.

Mary relies because what announces her the angel is too big. It also applies to us: only by making us bring by the hand of God can we welcome those children that God wanted to like this. "Deskate himself from sleep, Giuseppe did how he ordered the angel of the Lord and took his bride with him" - We read in Matteo's song - We too took our children with us, we welcomed them, we made them feel at home, because in them we could express the project of God. That our children, like all the children, come from the love of God we know it, the Church does not.

"I greet you, or full of grace, the Lord is with you." Those words of Luca's text put Mary on another plan, they create distance between her and the other women: she has touched her to be full of grace, But who does this not touch?

Maria, who is at the limit of social acceptance, is chosen, as are other women in the Bible, united by the irregularity of their state towards the social rule: prostitutes, sterile, foreign women. Among them is Maria, a pregnant girl, whose pregnancy, out of the wedding, leaves doubts and exposes to heavy judgments in the society of her time.

It is through them that God performs his wonders. A grace that illuminates those who are in the shade, put at the center who is crushed on the margins, but at the same time does not simplify life, does not offer shortcuts.

The grace of God did not simplify Mary's life, and perhaps only after having lived that very hard experience, which would never be chosen, Mary was able to reread what had happened in her as grace of God.

Luke 1.26-38

In the sixth month, the angel Gabriele was sent by God to a city in Galilee, called Nazareth, to a virgin, promised bride of a man from the house of Davide, called Giuseppe. The Virgin was called Maria.

Entering her, he said, "I greet you, or full of grace, the Lord is with you." To these words she was troubled and wondered what a greeting made sense. The angel said to her, "Do not fear, Mary, because you found grace with God. Here you will conceive a Son, you will give it to light and you will call him Jesus. It will be great and called the Son of the Most High; The Lord God will give him the throne of David his Father and reign forever on the house of Jacob and his kingdom will end ».

Then Maria said to the angel: «How is it possible? I don't know man ».

The angel replied: «The Holy Spirit will go down to you, the power of the Most High will spread its shadow. The one who will be born will therefore be holy and called the Son of God. See: Even Elizabeth, your relative, in his old age, conceived a son and this is the sixth month for her, that everyone said sterile: nothing is impossible for God ». Then Maria said, "Here I am, I'm the servant of the Lord, what you said happen to me." And the angel left her.

Matteo 1,18-25

Here's how the birth of Jesus Christ happened: his Mother Mary, being a promised bride of Joseph, before they went to live together he found herself pregnant by the work of the Holy Spirit. Joseph his bridegroom, who was right and did not want to repudiate it, decided to fire her in secret. While he was thinking about these things, here angel of the Lord appeared in a dream and said to him: «Giuseppe, son of David, do not fear to take Mary, your bride with you, because what is generated in her comes from the Holy Spirit. It will give birth to a son and you will call him Jesus: he, in fact, will save his people from his sins ».
All this happened so that what had been said by the Lord by means of the prophet was fulfilled: here, the Virgin will conceive and give birth to a son who will be called Emmanuele, which means God with us. Deskate himself from sleep, Joseph made how the angel of the Lord had ordered him and took his bride with him, who, without he knew her, gave birth to a son, whom he called Jesus.

*The return is a sort of report of what has been said during the meeting. As in a collage, significant fragments of the interventions of the individual participants, words and thoughts expressed by each and each one are placed together.

** WORD… AND WORDSIt is a Christian experiential meeting group for parents of LGBT people and LGBT parents from Rome. We meet to travel and trace the journey together towards an inclusive society and church, where nobody is put on the edge. We do it following in the footsteps of that Jesus of Nazareth, who, on the streets of Palestine, shared his life with the excluded and excluded of his time. We meet once a month, normally the first Friday, at 8 pm at a place adjacent to the church of Sant'Ignazio. Those who are interested can contact us in these contact details: Alessandra Bialetti Cell. 346 221 4143 -alessandra.bialetti@gmail.com; DEA SANTONICO CELL.338 629 8894 -dea.santonico@gmail.com